I am trying to do the right thing for my child. I found a family that I thought I liked. They sent me a long letter telling me about themselves and other things. Like they adopted a little girl 4 months ago and they want to raise them like twins though they would be 6 months apart. She is an attorney and he is a state trooper. I hae a ccouple issues with them. I want an open adoption, you know like photos and a letter from the parents once a year. They claim that they are okay with it but then they sent an email to my mom saying how hard it would be for their other daughter that I want contact and her birth mother doesn't. They said it would be "unfair". What about me, that would be unfair for me. I am not okay with that. I could handle the christian thing because it would be brought up in a loving home. I am afraid to keep the kids "equal" that she would make them both think that they were unwanted by their mothers. She doesn't want me to hold it, she says since the first 3 days are the most important it would be best for me to have no contact with the child. At all. I need some sort of closure and not allowing me to have that would not allow me to feel right, normal I should say. What I need is a family that isn't worried about money, (Paying for the birth is what the adoptive family is supposed to do), and isn't going to treat me like some giant loser. I just want to be able to say be to my kid. They had also mentioned me signing off custody before she is born so that I won't be able to change my mind. I may change my mind, I don't know if I will, obviously but a little respect is always nice.